3 things to do when you feel annoyed with your students

I'm so annoyed that . . .

The students don't do what I say
They don't line up silently after I asked them a thousand times
That they leave the crayons one the ground
That they don't clean up the classroom so it is neat
That they keep on asking to go the bathroom while I am teaching
They keep on tattling at the end of recess when it is line up time

Have you had one of those thoughts? Maybe even more than one time! I know that I have had thoughts like this on more than one occasion :) It is only natural that some days you are going to feel tired, or something won't go as planned, or for whatever reason you will have thoughts that lead to annoyance.

Having the thoughts is fine. Actually believing the thoughts leads to annoyance.

So what should you do?

Step 1: Lower your stress level.

Here is something you can say to yourself. Sometimes, it even helps to say it outloud from the third person. I notice I'm having that thought about the students not lining up silently even though I've asked them a thousand times. I notice that I'm feeling annoyed when I think this. I can notice the thought and notice the feeling and let it float away. Next time I have the thought I can think - oh, there is that thought again. 

Or maybe you lower your stress level by dancing, or taking a walk, or talking with a friend (about something other than your feelings), meditation etc.

Step 2: Assess if your expectations are realistic. 

Are you getting annoyed that students can't do something that they never mastered in the first place?

Notice your automatic response here. Almost every teacher will say of course not - they know what I mean when I say line up! They just don't do it. But, please read carefully. Maybe they actually don't know what you mean. 

Here are signs that the students maybe never actually learned the routine to the level of independence:

  • Students only do the routine correctly if I talk them through each step
  • I have to give positive reinforcement during the routine for it to be correctly done
  • Students sometimes do the routine correctly and other times don't
  • At the end of the day (when they are tired cognitively) they make more errors in how they do the routine
Just like with any other skill - if the students can not do it independently and without prompting, they haven't actually mastered the skill. For example, if you have to remind a student every time they to divide all of the steps and say things like - you can do it, good job, keep trying, now you bring down the next number, now you need to subtract - the student has not learned how to divide! 

Step 3: Make a plan to reteach the routine. 

If you are feeling annoyed - this is a really good sign that you need to reteach your routine and reassess what you want to see. Close your eyes and imagine what the routine should look like from start to finish. Imagine yourself observing your students without saying anything. Don't accept less than what is possible. 

Now write out what you are going to say. Yes, make a full script of exactly how you will teach your routine. Then start by practicing at home. Read your script at least 3 times out loud while standing up.  Actually act out what you are going to do and what you are going to say. Ask a friend or colleague to pretend to be a student and practice. 

Routines might be the single most important foundation skill you teach. Take the time to make sure you use your most impactful engaging teaching techniques for lessons on routines.  

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